Tuesday, October 4, 2011


I started this blog to share my writings with the world. I have compiled these poems in a book, and started a new blog at: The Recovery: http://therecovery222.blogspot.com

Read it and share your experiences.

Friday, September 23, 2011


Years of fatefulness
To be torn by the ones you love
Understanding we are often under the sway
of the enemy of our souls
we wound
shall we not forgive the ones that wounded us?

This God Jehovah
commanded love
to come and life forevermore
and His justice complete
requires we wash the feet of the ones
that for years or weeks
maligned us

When you feel the nails penetrating your flesh
at the moment when the pain is fresh
while the spit is still on your cheek
understand the way of the meek
and forgive and bless them.

Pslam 27:5

"For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock."

I'm in the pit.
They can't find me now.
I'm in the darkest place,
in the a gloom
where they cannot pursue.

Why do you cry your blood is enough
to cover me?

I am in the womb of preparation.
Immersed in the waters of affliction.
And you know I'm here.
But, they can't find me.
No one pursues me now.

In this place, I must patiently wait
to be lifted up.


Sexually Abused child.Image via WikipediaOf the pain of being sexually abused.

See the one that was broken and crushed
over and over--
See the one that was burned beyond
cast out like dust and scattered as

See her in perfection
made new as a jewel
not left in her blood and shame

And they that looked upon her nakedness,
those that saw her polluted in her own blood,
and walked by on the other way,
them she is restored to save.

Blessed healing
Only heaven can touch
Windows to my soul
my dread
my red tidings cried out to Him
now I am standing in the courts of the King
I am the resurrection and the life.

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Tuesday, August 23, 2011

1 Peter 1:22

1 Peter 1:22 (ESV) Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for(BB) a sincere brotherly love,(BC) love one another earnestly from a pure heart,

I did not know how to reach you,
And I write because I love you,
I write because there is an impossible
expanse of time and space between us
But, I love you, and I want to know you.

You are my joy, my beloved.

And, I know as you read my words,
you will know me
and in some small way,
I can touch you
and make you complete

these strange little things
these marks on the page
are my message of Love.

And His is the same,
Brothers and sisters of this
current age.

And what if you had never seen the Father
through my eyes
And I'd been silent of His love,
then your life had been untouched
and your life not enough

But, I have some sense that
it is written
that I wrote to you


Speak, speak ye holy ones with understanding
And sing ye holy ones with liberation
push back the darkness
reveal the Son

And live, live ye holy ones in righteousness and love
'Til Kingdom come
in all His might
the victory's won

It Wanes

Concerning the tremor in NYC that occurred at the end of the 13th hour of the day.

Will we cleave to what is passing away?
The pleasures of this time, whatever we can imagine in our evil minds?
Will we hold the buildings up, built on the the blood of innocents?
Will we redefine our purpose by joining the same sex in marriages before God?


And who profits as we buy the pills to prevent life from flourishing in our wombs?
Who profits when we choose to work over raising children to love the one God?
This journey is wearying and has a certain end in infinite death.
Because He is boundless life.

We have spat at Your face.
Shaken angry fists at Your law.
What will you do Father?
What now will You remove?
The islands will flee,
The mountains will tremble,
and crumble at the though Your impending judgement.

And we smile, and dance with Glee.
Because we are free
to choose humanity and lawlessness
over Truth and righteousness.

Your jealous love
makes all things new
I will embrace it
as all else wanes.

Revelation 16:20 And every island fled away, and no mountains were to be found.
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Like a Child

I had been away for a while
And there was this void that I could not explain
The absence!
And I heard it in your voice when you spoke
We could not agree on what is was

When we don't speak,
a part of us dies
You have what I need
I have what you need
Expressions of perfect love

And the canvass is your eyes
On which I can see the perfect expression
sparkles of joy in your eyes
from knowing me apart from my appearance
You've seen the Father

Oh, but we've been apart for a while,
and I've even been too busy to say a prayer
for your welfare
and I saw the weariness in your eyes when I saw you today.
and I knew that we would be revived when enjoined under His banner of love

Our bond
Is one that looks like melted Skittles
on your mother's prized holiday dishes
simply beautiful
unless you wanted homemade cookies

I'll hug you for a while
and do not fear
because I love you
and we're okay now.

Monday, August 15, 2011

The Clash

In response to the solemn assembly called this month in Texas by Rick Perry, Governor of Texas.

I saw freedom fighters without guns.
The swords of their mouths destroying self.
Faces deadpan.
Warriors bearing the mark of Christ.
They came first on their knees, pleading to the Judge to suspend all unrighteous deeds that vex the spirit and wound the soul.

He stayed.
They rent their hearts.
He waits.
They rend their souls.

Oh God is all that is like You soon to be lost?!!
A dark tempest rises.
A storm of impenetrable darkness.
He shines.

They say we have freedom to determine how to live.
Fatherless children...
...look what they do.

The Star-gazers left their Bibles at home.
Carried in the Spirit to a war they could almost understand.
Give us eyes to see.
They roared and praised the One, the only Son and Father.

At last. At last He came like a flood of lit waters.
And everywhere His glory was seen.
In those like Him and those seeking.
I saw the final sweep to victory came suddenly.

Creation sighs -- eternity.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Meditations Reading Job

There was a woman whom I worked with for these past two weeks. She had a tattoo on her wrist from Rev. 19. I guess she remembers the beginning of the end everyday. Also, a response to "Song of Hiawatha."
Somewhere in the heavens
Sits One waiting to eclipse the darkness
He that is swift as the waters
He that set the earth in it's place

With a face outshinning the sun
The One of infinite wisdom
with locks that also shine
This man with beautiful locks and a voice
calming like the waters
Came down

to see me stand
The Lord came down
and descended to the pit
and raised up ignorant ones
like me

He teaches me, a life of service
is a key to the Kingdom
maybe I could wash his feet one day
maybe the clouds will part and I will see
the elders and the angels that ever
Glorify the Lord of the fires

11 Now I saw heaven opened, and behold, a white horse. And He who sat on him was called Faithful and True, and in righteousness He judges and makes war. 12 His eyes were like a flame of fire, and on His head were many crowns. He had a name written that no one knew except Himself. 13 He was clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and His name is called The Word of God. 14 And the armies in heaven, clothed in fine linen, white and clean, followed Him on white horses. 15 Now out of His mouth goes a sharp sword, that with it He should strike the nations. And He Himself will rule them with a rod of iron. He Himself treads the winepress of the fierceness and wrath of Almighty God. 16 And He has on His robe and on His thigh a name written:


Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Feelings that come and go

IHOP.ORG Live Stream @1:00PM-2:00PM CST Tim Reimherr 

Look I fled from your grace, because I wanted perfection.
The perfection to come in the latter days,
or rather when You become Dayspring.

But, in hours I turned again.
And I don't know why.
It's better here.
I think.
I believe.

Everything is wearying but sitting with You.
Everything takes,
but You give.

I don't want to live in the "one day."

Guess that's where I am. It pulls me. It tears me. My unfaithful heart.
My selfishness. My demands.
Perfect one! My soul groans for Your Perfection!

What will I share with them?
Better days to come?
My brother said that wasn't worth living for, not better tomorrows.
I told him enjoy Your love and guidance today.
And every day I struggle to find it, to be there....sometimes
it seems too long,
our translation into light.

However, not only creation groans. We, who have the Spirit as the first of God's gifts, also groan inwardly. We groan as we eagerly wait for our adoption, the freeing of our bodies [from sin]. (Romans 8:23; GOD'S WORD Translation)

Israel my envy

I looked over the hills of Israel.
Each raised its head proudly
with anticipation of the returning Master.

His feet will walk there again.
Israel, my envy, that you have kissed the feet of my Lord
And you must be His first delight,
because He will give you new robes
And clothe you with new splendor

All the nations will come to you for love and wisdom,
for in you will dwell Light and Life.

Israel, my envy,
He will grace with His Love and perfect government.

Would you send a trickle of your living waters my way?
I want to bathe in the wisdom of knowing the Lord.
I seek the hidden manna of His words.
You have so many of His words!

They echo from the rocks on which He sat!
Even the rocks that have been buried.
Oh the glory! The majesty!
And it is a holy calling to bear the place where He bled
for the world to be reconciled to the Father of all.

Tell me Israel, tell me desire of the nations and soon coming King,
is there still place for strangers in your doors
though I have found Him late,
I will love Him for all my life,
and with all my life.

Welcome me sister into your courts. I am coming to seek my Lord.

Here and Hell

Response to watching TBN's Special on Don Piper's 90 Minutes in Heaven and Bill Weise's 23 Minutes in Hell

Truly love makes all things beautiful
Truly Love makes all things new
To receive love
To live in love
Suddenly everything transforms

The light
And everything it touches
The clouds
And and their transient nature
Oh the scent of the oceans and trees!


Then all colors fall to darkness
utter darkness
Music never again stirs the soul
Wailing and torture filling
the emptiness

and no place for love
no place for pleasantries
no place for peace

His absence is desperate and damning!

The things you love.
He is all these things. And He gives Himself freely. Can we not be captured in His utter beauty?

I am in more in love everyday.

Sunday, May 29, 2011


This is a poem about Sophie and Jonathan, David and Diana, and Peter, dearly loved friends that I may not see again in this lifetime.

I'm longing for the Kingdom coming for all to ones to whom I've had to say good-bye
my heart aches daily for them
I try to shake some sense into this love
this bond of love lasting beyond the grave
still it lingers
so I remind myself that these eternal beings
will again receive me with joy
when we walk into eternity

And someone told me that I could replace them with new friends.
Not so, not so--
It's just that each is so different!
It's like donning a horse-hair toupée
just doesn't fit
all their likenessnesses
all their differences
are so distinct
and wonderfully suited for the times we meet

Am I wrong for wanting to keep, their God-likeness near?
I feel as if I am a brick in His house
and they are the pillars
with the semblance of amber or fine brass
that He gives to uphold many
and because they are strength to many
I cannot hold onto them selfishly
their beauty is in their position and intention
to stand beside and underneath

Him that overcometh will I make a pillar in the temple of my God, and he shall go no more out: and I will write upon him the name of my God, and the name of the city of my God, [which is] new Jerusalem, which cometh down out of heaven from my God: and [I will write upon him] my new name. (Revelation 3:12)

A rant about higher education and consumerism

whenever you go after the forbidden fruit
Knowledge that exalts greater than the One
Who formed it

You know, you find it sometimes in school
or self-help books
transcendental meditation
We can't help ourselves, can we?
the hunger for knowledge to find--
We can't help ourselves:
He can,
the very One from who we demand
every point of the plan
so that He can't lead us

Stubborn sheep, wait, guess I mean goats
If we can't be the center
then there's little hope
for the completion of the plan
Hey, God! What about me?
Where's all those promises? And, I need to eat.

The wall's up
constructed of every injustice we ignore
in favor for 2 cups of Stabucks and CrispyKreme hole?
All the while, He searches for souls,
who can be trusted with true riches and what He knows.

She drifts to sleeplessness

While listening to the Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon Soundtrack

I wait in a meditative state for You oh Ancient of Days
away from Eden
to hear Your counsel for these final days
Your voice walks between consciousness
I hear You when I think I'm awake
and to remember your words is life to my bones
Your words endure beyond them

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Psalm 46

This is a song I wrote inspired by current
events and Psalm 46

Why do you fear, you who hope in the Lord?
These are the signs of His coming.
Walls fall down of great cities.
Great towers fall of the heathen.

Though these mountains are cast in sea.
I know my present and future is thee.
When I rise to the wailing of hell.
I will run to the Fortress to dwell.

My God. You are with us. (Voice 2)

You move with indignation.
The kingdoms here are shaken.
Oh the desolation!
The men of war are quaking.
Hear how they plead for peace.
You promised judgement.

Be still and know
that I, am, God
I will be exalted! I will be exalted! (2xs)

Among the nations, in the earth
the King who's coming, the last, the first (2xs)

My God. You are with us. (Voice 2)

Monday, May 23, 2011

Burning for Love - a song

inspired by my brother meeting his fiance
...definitely not one of the nicest things I've written, and it's incomplete, but...

tattoos up her arms piercings in her face
she's searching for the one that no one can replace--
and he says she's beautiful

what lies had led her there, homeless unaware
she's always bringing on these random love affairs
and she says she's beautiful

sex on the ledge, sex on the edge
she tells you all her partners, you should have asked her legs
and they think she's beautiful

This world's not yours
nor your body
The time's not yours
it's unwinding
and when it ends
will you be friends
or somewhere burning

burning for love, burning for love

(added this verse after I recorded it, ha!)
he looked in her eyes, he never saw the time
just took her in to see, if sex was on her mind
and he thinks she's beautiful

This world's not yours
nor your body
The time's not yours
it's unwinding
and when it ends
will you be friends
or somewhere burning

burning for love, burning for love
burning for love, burning for love,
burning for love

Sorry about the muttering. I didn't want my brother to hear me:)

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Thoughts, Not Poetry

Can you accept that God's not through with me yet?
It's not, you're saved and then abracadabra you're God-like
These are the many things about me that I cannot believe
I want to tell you the truth, but abracadabra I lied.
I want to be there for friends, but abracadabra I hide.
I want to do well in school, but abracadabra I procrastinate.
I want to love everyone, but abracadabra I hate

everyone that gets in my way, and takes my energy from my goals.
What have I learned from Love?
Be patient.

Be patient with the insincere liars, that aren't there for you when you need them, that are lazy with their work, and blame and hate you for it.

Be patient. I'm a work in progress. I will not pretend to be perfect,
and I do not expect you to be.

If everyone could just hold everyone to this standard - to forgive those that fall time and time again, just like you. There is heaven. There is a kingdom worth living in.

But, here are my false starts. Any suggestions on how not to be human?
I'm listening.

Two Feet In Front of Me

My whole life was two feet in front of me
where I would decide to go
what I would decide to do
and who I would decide to listen to
from now--on

It's on, and I cannot focus on what I need to do
These pixels are perfect
Not a reflection of the users at all
Two feet in front of me lies my life

In a basement, undisclosed
Closed off rather
"Do Not Disturb"
I'm trying to make something out of nothing,
or pixels, same thing right?

Two feet in front of me.

Don't have time to listen to your problems.
I'm trying to fix my own. I'm sure Google knows...
how to fix a life,
I've only moved two feet towards what I can give

The rest is lost in memories, digital photos of the places
I've gone
The people
I've met
The past, but what of the becoming--

Two feet in front of me,
what a wonderful gift
to go
to an online chatroom and find neighbors across the world
can't stand the ones across the street
The ones through the lines have an airbrushed illusion of me
that they admire

I thought I'd love it. I hate it.
I've only shared my good, but I expect them to know my failure.
Are we done pretending?

So I'm taking my two feet, stuffed neatly beneath my desk, and I'm sitting here until I complete--
what I started. An accurate depiction of disconnect.

Response to Jim Rohn's talk "Turning Nothing Into Something"

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

A Day of Turning

This is my salty deliverance
work for work's sake
a length of days I do not look for
everything builds to nothingness
I'm searching for certainty
But, I think this time is passing,
I think this time is ending so,
I live

Measures of times in bliss
Attack my memory
the torture--every morning of good dreams
to wake to this mystery,
doubting I was asleep

This fantasy, this dream, must be this decaying
substance that stares at me, from sunken sodden eyes
I dream I'll wake again in eternity
to find the whispering mind
not the words spoken
were true

This is my detestable time of labor
It does not end
God inhales, we sleep.

"Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit. Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away." James 4:13-14

Thursday, March 17, 2011

The Right Way

Jude 1:23 Save others by snatching them from the fire. To others, show mercy with fear, hating even the clothes stained by their sinful lives.

I think I know something of the human spirit
only those that have died twice can hear it
the beginning of the trumpet's call
for all those who've been standing close and far
those like me far enough
to feel the heat
the earth's spewing up
wake up with singed hair and feet

Then at some point you decide there's no doing
that won't lead to your ruin
as long as you're a truant
from the Truth

Waves and wells, waters in spells
all illusions
there's no light here
just a hungry night
no love
no purpose
no vision
praying for the next beat to end
of this chorus of wailing and then
I realize, this isn't a dream this is the afterlife
and hell has no exit.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Changing tide

...Yet another sad breakup poem

I am at the turning of the tide
Couldn't hold it if I tried
It all goes out together
My sustenance
And leaves me dry

Sitting on these crags
My company in the sun
Will You give me salt water to drink?
As I meet another age alone

No use, no use, chasing the tide
everything I've done
no longer hid
the change has come

a death of idolatry

you were my meditation day and night
your memory my daily food
the thought of you sustained me
that I would be with you one day was my strength

I desired you more than my necessary food
and I built to give you life more abundantly
how could I not see that your heart was far from me?
now I am altogether brought low and downcast
at your swift dismissal

a degree, a new home, a plan

castles made of sand


nevertheless, this endless desert is what I drew
it was my contemplation true
not you,
you are an mirage,
this desert, with thirst and heat is real.
You, I cannot touch.
this desert sears my soul.

Thursday, January 20, 2011


i can't protect you from what may come
but i can promise i'll love you through it
it's not something you can throw or
or predict
or calculate
what will happen, what will become of this...

...all i know is that my eyes have seen the glory
of the coming of the Lord.

i have scenes in my mind
of what should, could be
and with my fear
i press towards
these impossible...

why won't you press with me
with our force combined
we'll press harder
and perhaps both make it to
that day

Monday, January 10, 2011

The Worth of a Man

of my visit to see him

But I went there.
And the worse thing that you could do to me was nothing.
And now the worse thing that you can do to me is nothing.
If it were a power play,
If you were but constrained,
If you had words or deed that you would render,
It is too late
2010 was the deciding year.

And please don't frown upon me now,
Or my actions
To preserve my peace.
There are plenty of girls to pursue and cheat.
Is this all I feared?

Yesterday a day was coming when we would be together.
Tomorrow that day will never come.
I hope you understand.
Your wealth and riches lied in your smile and helping hand.
Thousands later you'll understand.

The worth of a man.