Saturday, October 31, 2009

Reflections on my miseducation

Tell me you're the benevolent type that will bless me with knowledge
yeah the god you worship
Don't play pretend with me
Your works are tokens; your actions speak.

Some hated you to death.
You breathe, receive curses on the eve of your "prosperity's" day of worship
I'm not with it
handing out diplomas on what we have built
everything temporal
everything wilts

Fair flower with the grace of God, the face of God,
the light of God in your eyes, tell me
How did you get so rank?
Every time you drank others' knowledge
and preached it to me, you stank.

I'm finished. I think for you, I prayed everyday.
While you had your foot on me, while others wept,
pleaded and joined the fray.

Now is your golden moment, another chance to pretend.
No other god before us. This might be your ruining...
if you raise your foot again and not praise.

Praise Him! the preacher said

Is this consciousness absence from you
like the preacher said?

Is that why I see you more clearly
when I close my eyes?

And what of when I am alone?
Isn't it better then?
On my face again,
without a thought.

So when we erase it. No we chose the
taste of it. I'm clothed in my knowledge
of the world, not yours.

Freedom's Sound

A blanketed window fell
after I stepped into a space of grace
Never asking why, this wasn't my wish
but I had decided to be here with you God

Who was fanning the furnace
while You and I stood within

speckled shades, they were wearing, ash, crescent, glasses
orange and yellow sparks and white light burning away the dross

How precious it is to me that I did not ask
to receive your grace and favor

What a precious place to be. Transparent. Hated. Free.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

living waters flowed

Maybe in my mind I thought that beside Him I could be taught success and truth,
with all my mind,
I've wasted time
I've wasted time

with all my mind...I've wasted time

Hear wisdom child.
The Lord gives wealth.
Hear wisdom child,
there's nothing else,
that you should seek--
desiring week by week

wellsprings, living waters flowed, from within when I said no
to other teachers.
Hearing His Word, Writing His Word, Teaching His Word--
Let His NAME be heard.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Might come or lovely bones

Brother dear will I see you there in paradise when I come?
Two years rushing to nowhere.
Your life made me sad
Your death made me mad
that I hadn't yet lived

I asked God what to give
I asked God how to get
everything that I'm dreaming and still
two years later
run from run and nothing.

Thinking what it's made me.
Humming how it's made you a passing thought.
Things that I can never forget, boundaries set by
a flaming sword sits between me and you.


All this long way, I'm coming home.
I'm coming home.
Both of us promised not to live long;
Touching things coming, being things gone.

thoughts on the passing of my dear brother

How He Saved Me - a story

One time, a long time ago. I found myself in bed with the enemy
insatiable desire. He looked like bronze sun, raven hair, raven eyes,
his voice too sang out like a bird's. Walks under the moon with me,
with knowing. I pulled him into the crazy times too.

But, one night, I was there, near indulgence,
about to feed this humanity, this disease
insatiable desire. And then this song played
on the radio...

And methinks I heard the voice of God ringing out.
No Child. Go Child. No Child. Go Child
It's a funny thing. For the first time, clothed in my nakedness,
floating in the dark, I almost stayed there.
If you traded it all, it you gave it all away for one thing...
Those words were blacker than the pearls unlocked...
the ones my mother never gave me.

Rolled over into the dark expansion,
Death was gazing sweetly; I was in his mansion.
He caressed me once more. I hurried still to flee back
home before daybreak brought my fellows to thinking
other things about me.

It was fun, but not worth a life. I hugged death and kissed
him goodbye. To die for pleasure? I don' t think my feet
beat on the earth all the way home. I think He carried me.
I don't remember anything but a bright moon, cold air,
and that song. That Song! "One Thing" played on.

Friday, October 23, 2009

On Dreaming

Feel like it is a hardening cloud of doubt
when I'm in I'm out of it
I feel like everyone's a friend
I want to paint the lives of fairy tales, wishes,
then I wake up and doubt if I was dreaming

Because this God, this greater Being
Has given me eyes for seeing--The Great Beyond
If I doubt that we are here
If I hear the weight of glory rushing in
when I look into your tear drenched existence
What else can it be
But a waking dream?


Today I poured through the dreamscapes of nine years ago.
I searched for the girl I've come to know, but I found me
there in her stead. Laughing at was was hoped for and what
was said. It's like dead men trying to reach their loved ones
across a gulf to paradise and the lost ones...that believed.

My mother told me that she's happy I'm awake-realistic.
It is anguish to me. I swore that I would never forget that
science and liberties to not define what is. It's all in the mind
it's all in time that you find--the strength to climb the

In my dreams I was in love. I loved in many places. I loved
through smoke enough to bring those sights and sounds
before my waking eyes. The frightening, quickening sounds
that remind you that your being is not made of flesh. it seems I loathe to be that free. I must be careful
with you and me. I cannot trust that you'll be good. I never
give like we know we should. And I'm irritated that I have
even thought to rhyme about it. Because at one point it was
not my song.


Bright lights, bright lights, you're squinting
you pulled away from it
Those winds can turn you over
when it seems you could not be moved
the more you're awakened the more you lose--
touch with that place where love and mystery clothe you.
And you're not ashamed to bear your nakedness because you're
wrapped in God. Back to chaos--away with order as defined by the
lesser mind. If you can feel the crimson flood, if you can hear the horn
of righteousness. If you can really know that everything is wrong and it's okay
because this world is ending in a day. Then crash, crash into it--the chaos, that order He permits.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Absent Flying

I was stirred until I reach the top of the world and found no cap.
Now and wintering in soft states, wondering where I'm at.
It's alright I got to see my friend.
I learned she'd been beaten for leaning on Him.
I learned that she and her family are scared to pray.
Scared to raise a hymn, too scared to praise.

Blue lights, black nights
They're running here.
Too bruised, life oozed like toothpaste 'til
Bright angels came, with mystery names.

Bought a pass to the States.
Thought it would equate
to freedom
freedom was in God
'cause you thought with more laws
to protect you or a clause to prevent them from
beating you like it was their jobs
you could have more

But, you learned with every dollar
that none of this is making sense
How the pressures on you hotly
and the company pays your rent

You're promoted, never scolded and you feel like you're
alright. But, those glimpses at a freedom that you had when
you were caught -- praying to our God
are gone.

You're forlorn.
You reach for home.
God has your name in His book.
I knew you.
Didn't have to look.
He found you.
Now He's bringing you out.

Swift like a blaze,
eating what we grazed yesterday.


My mouth's on a mountain.
And I'm calling out.
Captives taste freedom.
He's cutting the route.

I thought that I would
dig and cut
but I learned I couldn't do nothing much
He with His strong arm and power
He that keeps you every hour
He that catches every tear
He that changes tides and years
He was listening, while I was sleeping and wishing
He has the keys to every door.
And He's leaning in more and more, as you let Him.

I saw the Father cry. When they hit you, after He died
to protect you from every harm.
I saw Him weep, when they tried to break you teeth,
when they held your arms and made you bleed.

He cried, then roared, and sent an earthquake.
He swore--by Himself
and sent you first rate sojourners to be their aid.
My Father, same yesterday and today.