Thursday, April 30, 2009

Love You Like a Song

The shadows in my memory are clearing
I know I loved you in times past
when freedom was the only option
why are you so closed with yourself?

Everything was like green fields in Springtime
I would walk and see beauty everywhere
I would sing your name
and the strangest things would remind me of you

Now the memories are like distant cries
or forgotten lyrics
they create an uncomfortable feeling
that makes me want to erase any memory of you at all

The song of our past is still sweet,
I remember it and smile,
but the now is like the discordant trills of a fallen bird
when you know the best option is just to kill it
rather than watch it die slowly.


My Thoughts on Loving Recklessly

Forget lighting another candle,
why not burn it up?
Why not pour out that passion inside of you?

They say nothing is lost in lighting another candle,
careful steps along the brink of heaven's way.
Do you want to feel what it's like to be under a flood of love?

Love recklessly,
with your eyes on heaven
and not on others
the love will rush back to you like a tidal wave.

What was it you feared?
Scare them with your perfect love.
They will tremble in light of Him.

If God is love and God is a consuming fire,
then isn't our job to be like Him and burn up our
selfishness, manipulative behavior, and lack with love?

Love reigns in the everlasting.
The powerful force that cannot be tamed.
Let Love ignite your spirit so you can set others aflame.

Hebrews 12:29 For our God is a consuming fire.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009


There's nothing better than being in Love, really.
From this place, in Love, you just, just...give.
And it pleases you to give with your heart.
And you would kiss the other's existence--
just because, just because...sometimes they remind you of Him.

And He's Holy, and He's Righteous, and He's Good.
And His goodness adds to your goodness and their goodness;
and soon your just enamored with Him.

Did you know? Did you consider that all He has said is Truth?
Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down,
and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom.
For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.
(Luke 6:38)

You cannot love too much and it will always be the accepted currency in heaven.
If you don't love you are nothing; apart from Love is death.
Love unreasonably, fearlessly, and even with indignation against hate.
You find yourself receiving Judas' kiss,
looking at him with loving eyes and smiling, when you are in Love.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Who Is Like Our God

He raised the waters
He made them still
He led us through them
We were not confounded in their midst
We were not overtaken and drowned

Our enemies pursued us
Our enemies pursue us
Our giant faith stands on the water's edge
Their dead bodies float by the water's edge

We sing who is like our God?
Bringing many hosts of warriors to naught?
We sing who is like our God?
Making a way in the midst of waters too high for us.

We sing as the Shepherd leads us to green pastures
After we have fought with enemies stronger than us
After we have journey long and are wearied with war
He makes us to lie down, beside the still waters,
He gives us rest and we eat from His hand.

He sang with the heavenlies

A room of God-chasers calling on His name
Funny some thought that they were there to praise
when some realized they were there to meet Him there
Those moments were life, health, and truth.

Your spirit quakes
You call it humbled
He calls it quickened

Opening your mouth and heart
new life floods in
we are here for many moments
that span into years
but were are always here before Him

And when we pause
And when we gather
And when we acknowledge the fact
Heaven kisses earth

Saturday, April 18, 2009

To Listen to the Noise

She realized something great today because she sees over many seas:
a complete person is the one that is completely with their God.

She saw this girl that was seeking wisdom and understanding
from those that stood in darkness.

It meant death for her to forget that they were not with
their God and could not offer her light on her situation.

Her heart went on listening and she found their sadness and
separation; then she remembered her God.

Completely in her God was the distance of east and west from

I Fear the Age to Come

Especially with each breath bringing me closer
I fear the age to come
the chance that I might not be the shining light in my dreams
the chance that I might still have the same hope of becoming
Dying to evolve into that butterfly
seeing the others fly towards the Sun

I fear the age to come
It's what brings me here
to this place where everything isn't worth a second glance
no interest in a go at romance

When at last I am at that day
will I be another in that age?
The poison of death takes you slowly
You think you're living, you're really living out your
last rites

oil running from my head
The transformation from darkness to white
white hairs cover our faces
Do we look like Him?

Do we even witness what He does?
He does not live in sorrow,
yet we are in the valley of shadows and sorrow
We cannot see the light, no not even as it is
emanating from us.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Test - Winners have winning habits

This is a test,
this is only a test,
to see if I can buy back my time
by writing in rhyme and
setting this post for my travel day.

This is a test,
this is only a test,
to see if I will work smart when
I know how to, or
if I will continue to do the same.

This is a test.

This Last Dance

If you knew that you would say goodbye forever today.
If you knew you would have to drink the poison and flow into the ether,
what would you give to the one that you love as yourself?

If you knew this was your final dance,
your final hour on the stage,
the lights burning the last image of you on their memory,
what then would you give?

If you knew there was no tomorrow,
no see you later,
no cheery good-bye,
If you knew it was struck fate,
dead end, no more finishes...

How would you tell them you love them,
that you were taking their memory with you to endless comfort?
How would you say to them that they had made this journey worth the walking?

Would it be another day like today,
dying to be alive,
thinking about what you should say and do?

Would you let it slip and never return if you knew...
If you knew that this was the last dance that you'd ever dance with them,
If you knew this was the last place that you'd ever bring them,
would the God-nature be in those moments that cause us to create lives?

Fire In the Belly

It's not close to love.
It's not even close.
It doesn't look like it or smell like it.
I know it's a passion, for what, I know not what,
and I know it gives me strength to go on.

I do not know why I do not tire when there is a fire...
I did not light, which cannot not be fanned
which cannot not be touched
not this time.

It's not love.
It's not even close to love,
yet similar, it creates sparks of passion.

Monday, April 13, 2009

The Decision

(Which is better, act now, think later or think now, act later?)

I've been sitting here and thinking of getting my life back in order.
I've been thinking about going out and getting some job applications
and going back to school too.

I've been thinking about calling my boo and telling him I love him.
Just thinking about it.

Flip the switch on this habit.

I've been getting my life back in order but I haven't thought about what
I want exactly. I'll figure it out as I go along.
I've applied for several jobs and no one has replied yet; let me keep moving.
I'm enrolled in school again, what a feeling to be around thinkers again.

I called my boo and hesitated to tell him that I loved him. I was thinking,
"I wonder what he's thinking." He said, "I miss you." I said, "I miss you too."

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Just When You Loosed Me

Do you want to climb the barrier?
Would you like to knock it down?
Or do you want to stand strong with a thousand others against it?
Pushing with the strength of a thousand souls against the crest of the wave that keeps
one oppressed.

You did not know
they had you locked up in your mind.
With fear
With doubting
You did not know they designed the mistrust,
a christening into the hopelessness.

Sometimes in the sacred year of childhood you hear Him whispering--
you're free.
And as you grow your only challenge is to believe.
Far from everything else, and how it seems...this truth remains.
Just when He looses you and you're walking on water,
the fear seizes you.

Is this humanity?
is fear what separates us from God?
There is no fear in Love.
Perfect love casts out fear.

Friday, April 10, 2009

what my spirit said

There are none wealthy, none poor.
There are some with faith that can be quenched
and some with faith like nuclear fire.

There are none foolish, none wise.
There are those that seek truth
and those that ignore it.

There are none gifted, none talentless.
There are some that run with little
and those that wait for more.

And they wait, and will be waiting...

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Beyond the Midrash

In him was the key
the flesh and blood would be our purity
none are forced to come and dine
the wedding invitation is open
to those who would die
for him

Divinity would die for us
Divinity died for us
Love is beyond death
Love is beyond understanding
Love, that fire unquenchable;

Love burns in every heart,
Says His name in every breath.
Love continues to create,
and passion is what populates the earth.

Little fires are power.
The focus on time, energy, and passion...
the willingness to do to the death,
there is progress.
We can never separate ourselves from
any more than we can separate ourselves from the Breath.


And because He loves me I am the fire of love
And the fierceness of hate is many waters
Then if we meet we both shall cease

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Tired in the Morning

I was eating all day because something was eating me when I woke up this morning.
Although everyone in my family was proud of themselves, all of us needed to look in the mirror.
For the last five years my father has purchased things he cannot afford to impress people.
For the last five years my mother has labored unhappily at the same job.
For the last five years my brother has resigned himself to a life of sex, drugs, and video games.
And for the last five years I have traveled the world at my parents expense.

This morning I was tired of it and had bitten into change. How long must one tear at the dusty circumstances for them to cease? I thought I had changed two months ago. I thought I had a new beginning a week ago, then I realized that I was just guilty by association. And that is what I would always be, one step closer, as long as I was dying to connect.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

I Write Poems

I write poems. I must feel to write them so I have not written in a while. I'm going through life not feeling much of anything, like when you're on a small boat...soon you just get use to the rocking that used to make you sick. And today, quite by accident I remembered a way that I have come to write poems in the past. Most have been from relationship troubles but some have been response to songs. This is my response to:

Is the purpose to be full or to be empty or to be satisfied with either?
Is the purpose to make others happy or to make yourself happy?
Is the purpose to be still or to live in stillness wherever you go?
Is the purpose to laugh at life's impossibilities or cry?
Is the purpose to rejoice in your strength or in your weakness?
Is the purpose to learn or to learn to forget?
Is the purpose to learn of yourself or of others?
Is the purpose to build or to simplify?
Is the purpose to...

When I was lead to the stream, and I saw that life really had little meaning,
because life was created by The Indescribable One,
We flow out to no certain end, and we could not understand that others were
as much a part of us as the other particles of water.

And would we be kind to them?
For kindness was really kindness to ourselves,
and our great error in thinking that we were other.


And I am waiting for him
four years
And I am longing for him
four years
And I cannot be wrapped up again
four years
Unless he comes

I was upset by honors that were given me
and I could ignore every quote I learned if it could
be exchanged for creative genius
I am a tempest met with a complacent wind
My storming does not move them
my storming does not make them move or fly
I have wearied myself with boasting my truths,
with swearing that they needed to be educated again?
What of my education?
I have learned to shut up
and listen
and to disappear
and to move silently
and not despair
that the world does not understand
that you just wanted to to know them...
or rather for them to know you as you are
and not try to change you.

Cease and begin again
They are chasing the dollar and not its worth
It would be easier for them to believe me if I slept on a
pile of dollars, but that's dirty,
I keep my bed swept clean
not a dollar in sight ever

(The Red Paper Clip Story, a response)
What did you build this house on?
Bricks, cement, or
hopes and dreams,
an experiment,
an adventure you dared to live