A Day of Turning

This is my salty deliverance
work for work's sake
a length of days I do not look for
everything builds to nothingness
I'm searching for certainty
But, I think this time is passing,
I think this time is ending so,
I live

Measures of times in bliss
Attack my memory
the torture--every morning of good dreams
to wake to this mystery,
doubting I was asleep

This fantasy, this dream, must be this decaying
substance that stares at me, from sunken sodden eyes
I dream I'll wake again in eternity
to find the whispering mind
not the words spoken
were true

This is my detestable time of labor
It does not end
God inhales, we sleep.


"Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit. Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away." James 4:13-14

How He Saved Me - a story

One time, a long time ago. I found myself in bed with the enemy
insatiable desire. He looked like bronze sun, raven hair, raven eyes,
his voice too sang out like a bird's. Walks under the moon with me,
with knowing. I pulled him into the crazy times too.

But, one night, I was there, near indulgence,
about to feed this humanity, this disease
insatiable desire. And then this song played
on the radio...

And methinks I heard the voice of God ringing out.
No Child. Go Child. No Child. Go Child
It's a funny thing. For the first time, clothed in my nakedness,
floating in the dark, I almost stayed there.
If you traded it all, it you gave it all away for one thing...
Those words were blacker than the pearls unlocked...
the ones my mother never gave me.

Rolled over into the dark expansion,
Death was gazing sweetly; I was in his mansion.
He caressed me once more. I hurried still to flee back
home before daybreak brought my fellows to thinking
other things about me.

It was fun, but not worth a life. I hugged death and kissed
him goodbye. To die for pleasure? I don' t think my feet
beat on the earth all the way home. I think He carried me.
I don't remember anything but a bright moon, cold air,
and that song. That Song! "One Thing" played on.

The Fullness of God

We'll all need to make this apology to ourselves
and to our Father at least one time in our lifetime
at second birth or at death
for being less than we should be
and knowing all the beauty of the Almighty was there
for giving precious time to meaningless endeavors
and for holding love back from the ones that needed it the most

We have to apologize to ourselves because we have come up short
and cheated ourselves of the fullness of God
and we will apologize to Him because His beauty strikes terror in our hearts

But every moment is lacking a frame
We make these invisible frames
when time cannot be measured
the illusion of an age, a memory ended, the past forgotten
It is One.

If we remember the fluidity of the ocean
and how nothing is created or destroyed
how can we then think the past is gone
this is how He is and how He speaks
and the old Word the new
remember this

The Wisdom

I cannot fully describe the shadow of death that was lifted;
You know when you've touched death.
You don't appreciate your existence.
You know the disappointments leading you there.

And at some time God steps in there and says live.
He says breathe to breathe, sing to sing, a live to enjoy.
And those things your grasp at that you have not attained,
you don't need them anyway. Not now.

To be now.
All you need is to realize what you have;
one could argue that one has nothing,
but gifts are given, and given abundantly from the Lord
for all to profit withal.
Do not be ashamed by what you have;
do not be saddened by what you don't have.

Be a witness wherever you go,
that a place that is better exists,
that true liberty is here for those that would die to find it.

Enigma number one.

How is that those that choose life
choose death...

I wrote the other day that I was not living to die
I was dying to live. In some small measure: the answer comes back
they are one and the same,
contained within the mystery that is God.
We live and die to Him,
but we are eternal.

It will be a perfect circle when we cross into eternity.

I Fear the Age to Come

Especially with each breath bringing me closer
I fear the age to come
the chance that I might not be the shining light in my dreams
the chance that I might still have the same hope of becoming
Dying to evolve into that butterfly
seeing the others fly towards the Sun

I fear the age to come
It's what brings me here
to this place where everything isn't worth a second glance
no interest in a go at romance

When at last I am at that day
will I be another in that age?
The poison of death takes you slowly
You think you're living, you're really living out your
last rites

oil running from my head
The transformation from darkness to white
white hairs cover our faces
Do we look like Him?

Do we even witness what He does?
He does not live in sorrow,
yet we are in the valley of shadows and sorrow
We cannot see the light, no not even as it is
emanating from us.